Couple’s Compass Finds a New Home: A Fresh Chapter Begins!
I’m so excited to announce that Couple’s Compass has officially moved to a new home at CouplesCompass.com! This fresh start feels like the perfect opportunity to connect with you in a more streamlined, welcoming space. I can’t wait to continue exploring relationship topics and sharing insights with you from this new, simpler platform. As with any…
The “Outgrown” Narrative: How Modern Mindsets Are Undermining Marriages
In recent years, a new narrative has emerged in relationship discourse, particularly among modern women: the idea of “outgrowing” a partner. This term has become a common justification for seeking a divorce or ending a long-term relationship, especially when individuals feel they have evolved in a different direction than their spouse. While personal growth and…
The Imbalance of Relationship Education: Why We Teach Men to Treat Women but Forget to Teach Women to Treat Men
In today’s world, there’s no shortage of advice, workshops, and self-help books designed to teach men how to treat women. From being attentive and emotionally available to taking on an equal share of domestic labor, the cultural narrative is clear: good men prioritize their partners’ needs and meet modern expectations of respect and equality. And…
From the Heart: Turning Our Conversations Into a Book
Dear Readers, This feels both exciting and a little nerve-wracking to share, but here it goes: I’m writing a book! After years of diving deep into the complexities of gender dynamics, relationships, and personal growth with you on this site, I’ve decided to take our conversations to the next level. This book will bring together…
Finding My Voice: When Helping Hurts and the Courage to Keep Going
I’ve always believed that helping couples rediscover love and rebuild trust is a mission worth pursuing, even when it’s difficult. Over the years, I’ve shared stories, advice, and a lot of my own heart here on CoupleCompass.org. But lately, something unexpected has happened: I’ve started receiving hate mail. Some of it comes from strangers, but…
The Truth About Sexual Compatibility: What to Do When the Spark Fades
When couples first get together, physical chemistry often feels effortless. It’s exciting, thrilling, and a powerful way to bond with your partner. But as time goes on, that initial spark can start to dim. Suddenly, the desire you once had for each other seems distant, and what was once an easy, natural connection now feels…
Accused of Hating Women: A Misunderstood Plea for Balance
Over the years, I’ve been accused of many things—being too traditional, being too modern, even being secretly a man. But the accusation that cuts the deepest is that I “hate women.” Let me be clear: I do not hate women. As a woman myself, I’ve dedicated my career to understanding and helping both genders navigate…
Why “Happy Wife, Happy Life” Is Killing Marriages (and What We Should Be Saying Instead)
If you’ve spent any time around popular relationship advice or scrolling through social media, you’ve probably heard the phrase, “Happy wife, happy life.” It’s catchy, simple, and well-intentioned. On the surface, it seems to advocate for prioritizing your partner’s happiness—a noble goal in any relationship. But here’s the problem: this phrase is subtly, yet profoundly,…
The Power of Presence: Why Stability Matters for Children and the Sacrifices We Make as Parents
As adults, we often find ourselves at a crossroads between what makes us happy and what’s best for our children. In an age where self-fulfillment and personal happiness are frequently championed above all else, the idea of sacrificing your own needs for the sake of your children can seem outdated. But when it comes to…
The Myth of the Perfect Divorce: Why Separation Isn’t the Solution We’re Told It Is
Divorce has become a normalized part of modern life, often framed as a path to personal growth, freedom, or even happiness. We’re bombarded with media stories of couples who manage to split up gracefully, becoming best friends, co-parents, or even business partners after their marriage ends. It’s a neat, convenient narrative that fits well into…
Why Men and Women Will Never Be Truly Equal — And That’s Okay
In today’s world, we’re often told that equality means sameness, that if men and women are equal, they must be identical in their roles, behaviors, and abilities. But is this really what equality should look like? The truth is, men and women are not the same—and that’s not a bad thing. In fact, our differences…
Modern Men: Why Are They Becoming So Much Like Women? (And Why It’s Not Their Fault)
Let’s face it: these days, it seems like men are getting… well, a bit softer. Gone are the rugged, stoic Marlboro Man types who could fix a car with duct tape and sheer determination. Instead, we’re finding more men who can tell you the difference between “eggshell” and “alabaster” white and have a favorite scented…
The Healing Power of Physical Intimacy: Why Sex Matters, Even When You’re Upset
In any long-term relationship, conflict is inevitable. Disagreements, frustrations, and misunderstandings can arise, leaving partners feeling disconnected or emotionally distant. During these times, it may seem counterintuitive to engage in physical intimacy. However, maintaining a sexual connection—even when you’re upset with each other—can be a powerful way to bridge the emotional gap and reinforce the…
A Conversation with Faith: Finding Common Ground Between Therapy and Religion
Not long ago, I had the opportunity to sit down with a local cleric. It wasn’t planned—I met him by chance at a community event where we both found ourselves in the back corner, looking slightly out of place. He, with his traditional robes and serene smile, and me, with my notebook full of half-baked…
A Cautionary Tale of Emotional Disconnection: How We Lost Ourselves and Each Other
Writing about my journey with Tom feels deeply uncomfortable—like exposing a wound that’s never quite healed. As a psychologist, I’m trained to maintain professionalism, to hold space for others without letting my own experiences spill into their stories. Sharing my personal struggles, especially one as raw and painful as this, feels like I’m stepping outside…
Lost in Translation: Why We Get Communication So Wrong (And How to Laugh About It)
If there’s one thing that trips up even the best couples, it’s communication. We assume that our partner knows what we mean, that they understand our tone and intention perfectly. But the truth? It’s shockingly easy to misread each other, especially when we’re speaking two different “languages.” What one person thinks is playful enthusiasm, another…
Choosing Your Partner: Why Prioritizing Your Relationship Over Your Parents Is Essential
One of the most significant shifts we face as adults is learning to prioritize our romantic partner over our parents. This transition can be difficult, especially for those who have strong, close-knit family ties. However, making your partner the primary focus of your emotional energy and loyalty is a critical step in building a healthy,…
The Importance of Vulnerability in Relationships: Why Sharing with Your Partner Matters
In the world of relationships, vulnerability is often portrayed as a sign of weakness. Yet, it is one of the most powerful elements that can bring couples closer together. Brené Brown, a renowned researcher and author of Daring Greatly, describes vulnerability as the “core of all emotions and feelings.” When we allow ourselves to be…
